Single Mother of the Week

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Sandra’s Story

 

I always knew that I wanted kids, but was not prepared to find myself pregnant at twenty-one years of age.  At the time I was heavily into drinking and generally destroying my life.  Along with this was a one night stand that changed my life forever.

I knew I was pregnant before I had even taken a test.  I could just feel it.  I was about three weeks along before I got up the courage to take the pregnancy test.  It turned positive immediately.  I had never been so scared in my whole life.  A million thoughts raced through my mind.  One thing that I never thought about even once was NOT having the baby.  It wasn’t even a possibility. 

I got married when Anna Grace was three months old.  I hadn’t known the guy long, but he seemed really good with kids and I knew he’d be a great dad.  Needless to say, the marriage didn’t last long, and I soon found myself in an abusive relationship.  I had to get my precious daughter out of that situation.  The laws in Kentucky (where I was living at the time) state that you cannot obtain a restraining order if you report an incident but there is no physical contact, even if there have been previous incidents of physical abuse.  That scared me.  The night before I left Kentucky for good, my ex-husband put his fist through the glass in our front door, while aiming for me.  And I was holding the baby at the time. 

I called my mom in Missouri and she borrowed a truck from my grandma and drove as fast as she could to come and get me.  We packed up as much as we could fit in the truck, which meant that I had to sit with my knees up to my chest for the six hour drive!  Every inch of space in the truck was packed.  I love my mom for helping me get out of there. 

I came back to Missouri in June, and by July I had a job at a Travel Agency.  I was able to move my child and me into our own apartment in September.  I was determined not to live with my parent’s.  I wanted to provide a home for me and my child of our own.  The job lasted for two years, and during the last six months before I walked out, my boss began harassing me for staying home with Anna when she was sick.  The daycare wouldn’t take her when she had a fever and I didn’t have a backup babysitter.  Everyone else that worked with me was single and under the age of thirty with no kids.  I was always on time and did everything my boss wanted without complaining.  But it wasn’t enough.  Finally his accusations of me not working and various other things got to be too much.  I knew that I had to figure something out because my stress from my job was being carried home and I was irritable towards my child.  

I left my keys on my boss’s desk and told him that I couldn’t handle it anymore.  He wasn’t being understanding and I was miserable.  When I went home that day, I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.  

I’ve been spending lots of time with my daughter and it’s been wonderful.  I am unfortunately depending on Government Aid to pay bills and buy food, but am starting school in August and plan to study Surgical Technology, and work in labor and delivery.  I want a job where I can make enough to support me and my child, but not have to spend 40+ hours away from her each week.  I look forward to being self-sufficient again, but right now, I have bills piling up and no way to pay them. 

I’ve volunteered raising money for The Children’s Miracle Network, as well as Newborns In Need.  Now I am in need of help, and I hope that my story inspires other single moms to get out abusive situations and know that they ARE strong enough to do it on their own.

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